


Shattered

by Donovanspen



Series: Whumptober 2019 [4]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Alec Lightwood Needs A Hug, Alternate prompt: Broken voice, Comforting Magnus Bane, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, Injured Alec Lightwood, M/M, Protective Magnus Bane, Self-Harm, Whumptober 2019
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-06
Updated: 2019-10-06
Packaged: 2020-11-25 15:20:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 825
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20914250
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Donovanspen/pseuds/Donovanspen
Summary: Alec feels the weight of a patrol gone wrong.





	Shattered

Isabelle and Jace were waiting for him in the hallway outside the training room. By their worried expressions, he had a good idea of what he would find on the other side of the wall.

“Magnus.” Jace greeted him with a nod. “Thanks for coming.”

“Of course.” He waited, giving them time to tell him in their own way why they had asked him to come.

“He’s…” Jace trailed off, his hand pressed to his side. “I can’t reach him.”

Now he understood. Magnus often came to the Institute to help heal wounds and soothe frustrations, but Jace also had a connection with Alec, and Magnus knew it hurt when Alec would shut him out.

“What happened?”

“A routine patrol that turned into an ambush,” Isabelle said. “This was supposed to be an easy training run for the younger kids, some of them on their first or second time out.”

Magnus heard what she didn’t say. Shadowhunters started young, and casualties were their way of life, but that didn’t negate the fact that these were young teenagers. And if Alec gave the order…. “The kids?” he asked.

“Fine,” Jace said. “We made it all out, but the senior Shadowhunters really took some hits trying to control the demons and protect these kids. We would have never knowingly put them in that position.”

“I know,” Magnus replied, sensing that Jace needed a little bit of reassurance as well. “Everyone made it back alive. You were caught unawares, but you still brought them home.” It was in this moment that Magnus remembered just how young these Shadowhunters were as well. They had seen and done much in their short lives, and it was easy to forget that they didn’t have seasoned years under their belts. And while he hated the burden his husband carried being their leader, he knew that Alec needed to set the tone so they could all regain their perspective and move forward.

“Do what you have to here,” he told them. “I’ll take Alexander home, and we’ll be back tonight to see everyone.”

He smelled the sweat and blood in the room before his eyes landed on Alec, who was pummeling the heavy bag with an intensity that Magnus knew was causing damage to his hands. He made a wide arc and came up slightly behind him, standing a little to the side so he could better see his profile.

Alec hadn’t healed himself. His face was marred with blood and scratches with similar markings on his arm. Magnus hoped there weren’t any traces of venom in those cuts. His pants were torn on the thigh, but the skin didn’t appear broken. His unwrapped hands were a different story though. The skin was split at his knuckles and his hands were slippery with blood. Magnus couldn’t be sure, but the way Alec moved suggested that his right arm might be injured in a way that he couldn’t see from his observation.

“Alexander.”

“Don’t.” Alec didn’t stop. His only acknowledgment of his husband’s presence was that one word.

“Sweetheart, it’s not your fault.”

“Don’t,” Alec said again, except this time, his voice wavered.

Magnus knew the signs. He stepped forward and placed a hand on Alec’s shoulder. Alec shuddered and his next hit landed off center.

“It’s not your fault, love,” Magnus soothed. “Everyone is going to be okay.”

“I can’t,” Alec stuttered, his focus still on the bag but his movements losing momentum. “I can’t do this.”

“Yes, you can.”

“No. Emotions cloud your judgment. We have a job to do.”

“Baby, look at me. You got them back home because you care. They’re safe because you are the type of leader who accepts his emotions for the strength that it is. This could have gone a horribly different way, but it didn’t because of how you and your team lead. They’re going to be ok, Alexander.”

“Magnus.” Alec’s voice broke on a sob, and he sagged forward, resting his weight against the bag.

“Come here.” Magnus nudged at his shoulder and stepped closer to Alec. His husband looked up at him, tears streaming down his face. “It’s ok, love.” He pulled Alec into his arms and caught his weight as Alec fell into his hold.

“They’re so young. Max is older than them. He could….”

“He’s ok,” Magnus told him, running his hand along his back and up into his hair. “Let’s get you home and cleaned up. Then we can call Max and come back here and check on everyone.”

Alec pulled back so he was staring into Magnus’s eyes. He seemed like he wanted to say something but couldn’t find the words.

“It’s ok,” Magnus repeated.

Alec let out another stuttering breath and leaned forward until his forehead was resting against Magnus’s. He was trembling, and Magnus knew it would take a little while before Alec settled down. He had taken the first step, though, and the rest would follow.


End file.
